Hey, McFly, your Chromebook and iPhone are obsolete
April 4, 2022
MCPS has moved far past the old days of pen and paper. The county has instituted a personal Chromebook for every student and most schools have normalized online services like Google Classroom and Canvas for the benefit of teachers and students. But WCHS plans to undo all of this, in a process they call “Operation: Back to The Future.”
WCHS has been modernizing all aspects of the classroom for years, but the Administration still believes that the new planning they have in mind will be a true game-changer for all.
“As a school, we have allowed ourselves to be brainwashed and totally carried away by modern technology,” the Administration said. “This entire time, we thought giving out free computers and installing overpriced Boxlight boards was the way, but we’ve come to realize that this has been our biggest mistake. The best thing for our students is to teach them the same way their parents and grandparents were taught.”
WCHS will soon take back all Promethean Boards, Boxlight Whiteboards, Chromebooks, desktops and even mechanical pencils. According to the Administration, there are better ways to learn. They plan to distribute old-fashioned paper, quills, ink and reinstall blackboards across every class.
“The school has solidified its intention to reject modernity and accept the past, and I completely support it,” WCHS physical education teacher and world-renowned bodybuilder Zyzz Shaversian said. “I think all these screens are excessive and they don’t offer anything beneficial for our developing young men and women. The most that the extra technology does is overstimulate and distract our students.”
Although the WCHS staff seem to be responding well to the projected changes, students feel very negatively towards these new guidelines. Many are confused, dumbfounded, and in one account, “flabbergasted by such tomfoolery.”
“I can’t believe that we are just gonna completely forget about the internet and go back to writing everything down!” enraged freshman Patrick Star said. “I can’t even Google Translate my French assignment anymore!”
Ultimately, “Operation: Back to The Future” has stirred quite the controversy at WCHS. Staff and students are experiencing different reactions and have mixed emotions about all that’s happening. Despite this, the WCHS administration is “trying their best” to convince parents and their children.
“The reality is, getting used to conventional reading and writing again is only for the best,” WCHS librarian Ms. Roz said. “I know it is going to be difficult for people to not be able to guess the new Wordle in class, but they are just going to have to deal with it.”