Calendar should be extended to thirteen months

Calendar+should+be+extended+to+thirteen+months

By Ariel Levchenko, Fact Checker

Hey, anybody know when Easter is this year? No? Oh, you do? Well, unless you’re the pope you probably just had to check Google to find out. Wouldn’t life be so much easier if we just had a fixed calendar?

Well, worry no more! In 1923, a man by the name of Moses Cotsworth proposed the idea of the International Fixed Calendar, a system by which time could be strictly regimented and regulated.

This model proposes splitting up the year into 13 months, each with 28 days – exactly four weeks. The mathematically minded among you probably just said, “But wait, that’s only 364 days!” Well, fear not!

The calendar accounts for this by making the 365th day Year Day – a day assigned no weekday and not belonging to any month. Of course, a few of the even more smart-alecky readers probably just said, “Well, what about Leap years, huh? What are you gonna do about those?” Fear not, we’ll just have another Year Day! Another every four years isn’t that bad, we’ll all manage.

Of course, some of you may be asking, “Why do even need this?” Allow me to explain.

First of all, having a standard calendar would make paying wages easier; 13 equal flows of money into the economy are better than 12 uneven ones.

Second, scheduling would become very simple – with 13 months, each exactly four weeks, and each month starting an ending on a Sunday, every month would be exactly the same. This standardization would mean that every holiday falls on the same day, every year.

Now, there are a few who don’t agree with this idea, generally the superstitious and the religious. The superstitious are probably scared of the fact that with this system, every month would have a Friday the 13th, while the religious may have conflicts with the celebration of the seventh day.

However, the first detraction to the system is just plain silly, while the other can be solved if people just sit down and talk it out. After all, we all adjusted to the Gregorian calendar, didn’t we?

Wait; if we moved to this system, the winter and spring breaks would only be a few days long. On second thought, let’s not move to the International Fixed Calendar. It’s a silly idea.